A Closer Look Than You Expected

This article isn’t just about your relationship. It’s about something even closer: the person who shows up inside them.

What if the real work isn’t just about fixing how you communicate, or learning to love better, but about turning the mirror around? Most people come here wanting answers.

They want to know why they keep repeating the same patterns. Why they always attract a certain type of partner. Why their needs feel unmet, or why love feels so far away.

Yet, the deeper consideration is this: What if, before you try to understand the relationship…  you pause to understand the one who keeps showing up in it?

The one who overthinks every word before speaking. 

The one who hides behind silence to keep the peace. 

The one who keeps trying to be enough, even when it costs them.

That’s where this article begins. Not with strategies or tools, but with a different kind of attention.

One that starts with you. Because it’s the beliefs you carry, the emotions you avoid, the survival patterns you’ve normalized, that end up shaping how you love, fight, trust, retreat, or endure. And unless you stop to look… you’ll keep repeating what you don’t even see.

This series doesn’t diagnose or blame. It doesn’t offer a ten-step plan to fix your partner or manifest someone new. What it will do is turn the light on inside.

Gently.

Clearly.

And sometimes uncomfortably. Because what we haven’t faced in ourselves, we end up acting out with others.

In the weeks ahead, each article explores something you may have missed, in yourself or the relationship.

You’ll meet ideas, stories and examples that don’t just describe the problem, but ask you to stop, feel, and consider: what if it’s not what you thought?

No two lives are the same, but most of us carry the same longings: to feel safe, seen, chosen, understood. That’s where we’re heading.

Some Questions to Sit With:

·      What are you hoping to feel, prove, or protect in your relationships?

·      What patterns keep repeating and what might they reveal?

·      Is there a part of you still waiting to be met, by someone else?

If this speaks to you…We won’t just talk about relationships. We’ll explore what’s been shaping them and how to come back to yourself in the process.

Visit www.katinapallaras.com for online sessions and for my book Awaken the Heart.